Archive for July, 2010

Anger

I have a three year old nephew. He is one of the most notorious kids, I have seen around. He meddles with everything thats in his reach. One way or the other, he manages to get his hands on the forbidden things (Scissors, Blade etc). Now, you should see him when his mom takes them back from him. He stiffens his lips, tightens his fist and brings his eyebrows together. One lion roar, and his mom is forced to compensate with a pack of chocolates.

Its amazing what anger can do to you. At the lowest level, the source of anger is helplessness. Does this mean angry people are week..? I dont believe so. Anger in itself is a strength, as patience is.

Well, then I though about my nephew again. Less than a year back, he wouldnt counter on resisting his mischiefs at all. It looked as if he silently accepted what was told. So, I was wondering if anger comes to you at a later point in time. Is it not hardwired into us..? is it induced externally..? I looked out for answers. And to my surprise, I found that anger, like happiness or sadness is a primary emotion that comes by birth. Sacrificing one’s own pleasure is also a way of showing passive anger.

As we all know, anger is an important defense mechanism in animals. Humans, sometimes use it as a manipulative strategy. As with any emotion, displaying anger can be exaggerated. Generally, a person who displays anger is regarded as more powerful than their counterparts who are more soft and submissive. To me, it seems anger is not as bad as it sounds. When used at right time in right places, it can be a lot more productive. Now you know, why your boss behaved so arrogantly in that meeting, before he walked up to you smiling in the cafeteria.

Anger also has dangerous effects. If not controlled, it can drive people crazy. A majority of crimes that we read day-to-day, happens in anger. Interestingly, displaying anger by yelling at or by verbally abusing is considered far better than piling up the emotion secretively and bursting out at once causing physical harm to others. Suppressing anger can be harmful for oneself. Like all other emotions, anger has to be displayed when felt.

Anger can cause disasters as much as it can cause miracles. I dont know whats right or wrong for my nephew. He could grow into an angry boss or a subtly manipulative subordinate. But, one thing is for sure, everyone find there own ways out to lead a happy, or should I say a balanced life.

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